Been Thinkin'

Been thinking of our upcoming separation in another month. I will be renting an efficiency to save miles on my van and because I know the winter commute may be very tricky. I understand that we have to do what we have to do, but it still doesn't sit well with me. LH and I were separated the first year of our marriage by 400 miles and an 8 hour drive. We moved in together 2 weeks before our first anniversary. I really don't want this situation. I want to be able to see LH at the end of the day or to have dinner together. I will miss my boys - Jett and Jazz fiercely and they will miss me greatly as well.
I will be hauling laundry back and forth and books and files. I will be living in two places and it will be unsettling.
I don't know what will happen when LH finds a new position. We cannot pay two mortgages and rent. I just have to trust that God will help us find a way through and change my attitude over this imposed separation. I cannot let my longings and resentment at this situation interfere with serving the congregation in a time of transition and change for them. This awkward, unsettled time of change and transition is one the church and I will be going through together and we will trust God to lead us and bring us to a place of new beginnings and new life.
In the meanwhile, we are heading for a few days to the Land of Cheese and to celebrate my sister's birthday and LH's birthday. It's been 5 years since we celebrated my sister's birthday in person. We decided to take advantage of our time off to be with family.
I keep praying that a position will open up for LH before too long so that we can start getting the house on the market.
Jazz is quite a character and we've had to crate him when we are gone. He's the first grey we've had to crate. The others have all behaved and learned the routine quickly. Jazz has conquered the stairs and sleeps in our bedroom in his bed at the foot of our bed. Jazz has more trouble going down the stairs and moving relaxed and slowly on the tile floor.
Perhaps, on the tile floor of our lives right now, there's a message for me too. To move relaxed and slowly through this time, trusting and having faith in God. Praying for courage, wisdom, strength during this coming month.

NEW ADDITION:

604.7 miles and a whole day later, we have welcomed a new grey into our lives - Jazz. Jazz joins Jett who also made the trip with us - and slept the whole day after!!!
After unintentionally fostering 2 other greys, this one seems to be a good match.
Ty was just too aggressive towards males and LH, and otherwise would have been a pretty good grey.
Jazz is brindle, short and compact compared to Jett, our fawn who is lean, long and very elegant. Jett is probably getting a bit tired of the whole affair of having to share with a new fellow and just about the time, the newbie learns the routine, he's taken back and yet another newbie arrives.
Jazz gets along with LH, wags his tail, climbs up the stairs and sleeps at the foot of our bed, hasn't had one accident yet, is good natured, curious, and seems to be content. He's 5 years old and we'll have to look up his racing record to see how he fared on the track. He seems to have been well-treated for the most part, which is good.
When we adopted our first grey - there were 50 greyhound tracks across the country. Now on our fourth grey, there are only 27 race tracks still left with a couple closing by the end of this year. That's half the tracks closed in 17 years.
Maybe there will be more responsible and less breeding and every grey will have a home when they are done racing.
Hard to believe that we've lived with greys for 17 years! Can't believe it's been that long- doesn't seem that long! Each has had their unique personalities and quirks and we've loved them all.
So we are joyed to have Jazz be a part of home, hearts and pack!

Ever see things you wish you didn't? Kinda like surfing the channels on TV and getting a glimpse of some bloody murder scene, an operation in progress, an emaciated animal, etc. Being home you see things around the neighborhood you normally wouldn't. Like there are about 4 of us neighbors who are not gainfully employed at the moment, at least around the cul-de-sac.
Since, we haven't gotten to know our neighbors real well, I often come up with nicknames that identify who is who. Funny, I can usually remember their dog's name while forgetting theirs!!!
There is a Yuppie couple (now with 2 boys and a new chocolate lab puppy) who live a few houses down. Yes, they've had Beamers and Range Rover's and a set of parents who drive a Jaguar and/or Mercedes Benz. I've notice of late, that he is home more, like the couple across the street who are rarely outside - they have 1 one year old and a Basenji.
While I was vacuuming out the van in preparation for our road trip, LH was in the driveway ready to go to the grocery store. He comes in and says, "The repo man is here." Sure enough, the nice looking Beamer is on the flatbed truck and and no longer in the garage of the Yuppies.
Felt pretty bad for them. I would be mortified. With both of us not serving and working, we are in a tenuous position ourselves. But we paid for our vehicles and neither are imports, just your average vehicles.
Perhaps, there is a lesson in all this about not projecting more than we are and have, not living beyond our means, saving, spending wisely. I don't know that they have any or much of a faith life, but somehow, with faith, priorities and values surrounding money are different. Part of what created the economic mess we're in, is not only predatory lending or greed, but also, folks who lived beyond their means. It is sad really. I pray that this family is able to get back on their feet soon, that he will find a new job, and that they will have learned to live within their means.
Sometimes, you see things you wish you hadn't, but you can't shut out reality and take in what you see with the eyes of faith, love and compassion.

Road Trip -
This year, we have unintentionally fostered two greyhounds. We are hoping that the third one's a keeper. Ty, although, he has settled down some, still has some male aggression and bit LH on his head, who wasn't provoking Ty in the least. Wearing blue jeans seems to bring it out more. Ty would make a great companion for a single female who needs protection. Most greys aren't "watch dogs" at all, preferring to welcome everyone who comes to the door with a sniff and wagging tails. Ty, is protective and barks. It's a shame because he did stairs right off the bat, when he had an accident, it was always on the tile floor and not the carpeting, and he responds to "NO".
So, this week we, LH and I, Ty and Jett will head to the Greyhound Rescue Organization's headquarters and together pick out a new grey. If only this wasn't a state away!!!! 10 hours on the road. It will be a long and tiring day.
We've enjoyed three wonderful greyhounds who all had some adjustment to make - but they all responded to "NO" and although two were wary of males none showed any aggression. We want so to welcome a new grey into our hearts and lives and homes and give them a second chance at life and a new life in a loving home with all the creature comforts they have never known and to which they readily adapt.
Jett now yearns for chest rubs once a day.
When I begin a new interim at the beginning of Nov. I will only be home two-three nights a week and he will have to cope with only two rubs per week. Yes, I am thankful for this new opportunity to minister and serve. I will miss coming home at night and sleeping in my own bed. I will miss LH and his support.
We lived apart the first year of our marriage, 400 miles apart, and didn't move in together until two weeks before our first anniversary. I really had hoped we wouldn't have to be separated again, but we must do what we have to do to meet our mortgage and pay the bills. (Sigh)
Sometimes, it feels like I've been "paying my dues" all my life with intermittent periods of relief. Perhaps, the "paying the dues" is a falsehood, and really doesn't apply to ministry where our values differ from the world's.
In the meanwhile, I pray that LH will be called to a position before too long, especially if we have to put our house on the market, knowing how long it takes to sell these days. I don't know how I'll pack up the house while living away from home, but, it will all be revealed in God's good time and I continue to trust the slow work of God.
For now, we will trust that there is a greyhound awaiting us who will fit in well, whose life we will fill with love and care and who longs to offer us his love.

NURTURING OUR SPIRITS:

Yesterday was beautiful sunny day and LH suggested that we go to the city on the North Coast and go to the Art Museum which recently opened a new addition. It was wonderful to feast our eyes and spirits on the beauty before us. How good it was to see the familiar and to see others that I don't ever remember seeing before. A great afternoon. We stopped at TJ's on the way home to pick up some lamb chops and a couple other items we enjoy and can't find around here for that price.
It's amazing what viewing art can do for my soul and spirit. Although some of the modern comtemporary stuff is not to my liking really - alot of it is angst ridden, dark, bleak, despairing, etc. I know that that may reflect life, but I want to see the hope, the beauty that is still and ever present around us. Perhaps, I have been in the angst ridden and dark places in my life enough, that I need to keep the hope of faith alive and focus on what faith in God brings and offers to me, to the world and to all who despair. God is about life, new, abundant, eternal, so much so, that God brings life out of death and desparately wants us to live, every day and always and forever. So, I seek out and savor the beauty of art and allow myself to be challenged by the modern contemporary although I can't say that I really Enjoy it!!!